28 September 2006

Holiday wish list

  • my parents to be here for Thanksgiving
  • my children to live here with me and to visit their mother only every other weekend and half the school vacations
  • my boyfriend to have a job he enjoys within 50 miles of our home
  • an iPod Nano for each of my children and my boyfriend
  • a 14 karat gold class ring for my graduate degree that I earned 6 years ago
  • tickets to Paris for my children, my boyfriend and me
  • Trading Spaces or While You Were Out to refurbish and restyle my classroom
  • a clear heartworm test for my dog Beau
  • regular, small translation jobs that pay well


Now that the cool winds swirl down upon me from the North Georgia mountains, I find it difficult not to look upon the might-have-beens of the year as it draws to a close. Another year has passed where I did not travel to France. Another year has passed where I have not taken any courses to renew my teaching certificate. I feel as if I am in a kind of limbo but not knowing either what lies beyond the boundaries of that limbo. Work is challenging only because there is not even a second to breathe between classes. My own lack of organization leaves me struggling with small mounds of paperwork to complete at home on a nightly basis. Only seeing my children every other weekend and my boyfriend only two days a week leaves me emotionally drained.

However, I am on the road to repair, even if only in the most literal of senses. After more than a decade since chipping the pearl in it, I have sent of my university class ring to be replaced. The watch that my boyfriend gave me and that I broke by accident is finally on its way to the warranty center to have the crystal and batter made anew. My car will have a new visor soon thanks to a solid warranty from Hyundai. So on a very material level, all is not in limbo, simply in a wait queue or in postal transit. By the time the holidays approach in earnest, perhaps my outlook will have changed for the better.